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That day I took him to fish in my favorite spot at the river. As I said, it was hot. We worked up a sweat riding out there. Standing in the shade of the huge trees hanging over the water it felt cooler, but I still felt sweat rolling down my sides. So I took my tee shirt off. That was a little better, but there was too little breeze to help much. Paul had also gotten naked from the waist up. That much was not a big deal, of course, even for teenage boys and grown men.The fishing was crappy, so we just reeled in our lures and sat on the bank. We both wore shorts and tennis shoes. We took off the shoes and our socks to feel the cool current lazily washing around our feet.“How deep is it here, John, do you know?” Paul asked.“I’m not sure. But I lost a lure and about twenty feet of line one day when I accidentally let it sink too much and it snagged on something.”“Do you ever swim here?”“No. I’ve waded some, but I’ve never worn my swim suit out to swim.”While my swimming skills weren’t. And even if his camera was pointing inmy line of sight, why did I think that "Princess" was in reference to me?Do I secretly yearn for men to talk to me like I am a girl? Was itimpossible for a secret sissy to keep their desires fully hidden? Was Igoing to mess up and accidentally say or do other sissy things in front ofmy family?I hope he didn't tell my sister about it because I don't know how I wouldexplain my way out of that jam. I feared my sister saying to me, "You wantto be called Princess? And Mom says you already like nice purses so youaren't that far from being a girl." She might also say, "Since you are sogirly you need to model dresses for the amusement of me and my femalefriends."My story is now drawing to its conclusion. In the current moment my motheris still trying to find out if I am gay and I won't say yes or no. I couldget her off of my back by saying that I'm not gay but as a sissy I don'tlike to say I'm not gay because it seems like an aggressive action.
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